Anniversaries

Today marks two anniversaries.

It's 12 years since my father died, on Oaks Day, 1997. I'm sure I'm not alone in missing him all the time, but it's a strange mixed feeling to say so because my mother is now in a new relationship which has brought a new family into ours. To say I wish Dad was still here is in some way to say that I wish they weren't - which I really don't. David and his family are our family now too, and I wouldn't trade that. So I have to compartmentalise the two things, and I find it extremely hard to make my brain accept a logical inconsistency. It will just have to deal though, because it's not like I need to confront the problem of what I would choose if I could undo the past, so I'll leave that well alone and wish them all in my life.

Today is also Elissa's second birthday. She's celebrating it with a black eye and a bandage as a result of falling onto the coffee table last night. We're not actually celebrating it until Sunday anyway, except for the mandatory goodies for day care (which I rather resent, actually). At 2 she's still a pretty wonderful kid. She's funny, chatty, cuddly, bold, loud and worships her brothers. She's also getting increasingly stubborn, belligerent and defiant. If you tell her something she doesn't want to hear, she will either shhhh you or swat at you (the latter very clearly done in the knowledge that it's unacceptable). So you know, she's 2.